Finally Friday

Most people are excited that it is finally Friday and are gearing up for the weekend.  I am excited because it is 1 day closer to being Cancer Free. My surgery is scheduled for Monday morning and I will be rid of this toxin that has invaded my body, mind, and soul. 

Yesterday was a big day.  I had my hair cut off to make it easier to handle during the surgery and chemo as well as preparing myself for what may happen.  I have never had my hair this short so it will be a huge adjustment trying to get used to it.  You can see how short it is from the side view.  Robert was amazing and respected my wishes and my fears.  We discussed the options and decided to keep it at this length for the initial cut and go shorter gradually over the next few weeks.  This will also help the kids adjust to the idea a little more.

This week has been crazy trying to take care of everything that needs to be done before surgery. Although from the looks of my house, it does not appear as if I have done anything at all.  I am emotionally checked out and ready for some sort of normalcy.  Bryan has been traveling with work this week and I am so glad he is back now.  His hugs make everything better and he makes me laugh which helps keep my spirits up.  

Kaitlyn has been in a battle with her allergies and she is fighting it every step of the way.  She has not felt great all week and turned 6 yesterday.  Alex appears to be holding up ok but I talked to some of his teachers and they say he is very worried about me.  Not surprised that he is not sharing those thoughts with me.  He has a gentle sweet soul.  Apparently, he is telling one of his teachers he is mad at the dr's because I am sick. He does not understand why I am tired and he also did not like the drain tube from the surgery 2 weeks ago.  Bryan and I will make sure to do a better job at hiding that from him this time so he does not get upset by it.  He managed to make his way in our bed again last night but it seems to make him feel secure so we will continue to do whatever it takes to comfort him (plus I love the extra hugs I get-he is such a great snuggler).

I am very lucky to say that I have amazing friends that call me just to check on me and offer their support everyday when Bryan is gone (and when he is here).  I am surrounded by people that love me and my family and that has truly helped me get through this ordeal this far. They have provided meals for me and the kids every night this week (and some a few weeks ago during my first surgery) which was a big help to me.  My friend Cherie' came by last night with a few goodies to cheer me up.  I now have my first official "Save the TaTa's Shirt" (which I love), some pink bling, and a special Guardian Angel coin with a ribbon symbolic of breast cancer on the back.  Bryan received his special Guardian Angel coin from Barbara and Kenny after 9-11.  He has carried it with him everyday for almost 8 years and it has alot of special meaning.  I am deeply touched to have one of my own to carry with me for strength during this tough time.

I am so grateful for all the help we have received.  I can't say thank you enough but I hope everyone realizes how much we appreciate everything they are doing to make things easier for us .